Monday, December 14, 2009

Vote for our bio pic and win!

Hello to all the new followers!

Welcome to our blog. We're Stacey and Julie, authors of young adult romance. You might have seen our covers on the sidebar, but until now we've had no shiny bio-pic to post for your getting-to-know-us pleasure. We both live in Arkansas, but several hours apart and we've got kids and husbands and animals and really long hair that requires a stupid-ridiculous amount of tending (Stacey plans to cut her's soon) and, well...it can be hard to get together.

Julie aside: Don't do it, Stacey! Don't cut your hair! If you keep growing yours and I keep growing mine then, when it gets reallllllly, reallllllly long, we'll cut it and turn the shorn locks into something cool. Like a lasso.

Stacey aside: Well...I have always wanted a lasso made of human hair...

Thankfully, however, we managed to meet up for a photo shoot this fall. The results are posted below for your viewing pleasure. (You'll have a chance to vote for your favorite at the end, so pay attention and get out your score cards.)

Another Julie aside: Before you begin voting, please have the record show that Stacey and her husband FORCED me to drink champagne during this photo shoot by offering it to me in a delicate, little champagne glass with a stem and everything, thereby playing directly into my sick weakness for all things "fancy."

Another Stacey aside: My husband and I would like the record to show that we do not support using alcoholic beverages to "loosen" anyone up for the camera...unless their name is Julie Linker and they like things that are "fancy".

ONE:



Stacey: Omg...I'm holding you inappropriately in this one. I've always wanted to hold you inappropriately, but I didn't realize that would be so apparent on film. (Or digital or whatever.) On the other hand, the matchy-matchiness of our outfits--(NOT INTENTIONAL, people, she showed up at my house like this in all her Single White Female-ness and demanded that we be photographed together immediately. She wouldn't even try on the very nice red t-shirt she brought.)---is kind of cute in the matchy-matchy way.

Julie: I think the innappropriate holding makes it obvious who the REAL Single White Female is in this picture, don't you guys? (Hint: the one who isn't me)

Stacey: Just for that I'm not going to correct your misspelling of "inappropriate" up there. *harumph*

TWO:



Stacey: This is a little better for me, though I still look a little like a psycho-killer. You look nice, however.

Julie: Look at my finger! My finger looks like a psycho-killer! What is it doing? Do you see the way it's creeping around your waist, all stealthy and stuff, like it can't decide whether to stab some of your internal organs or steal your wedding ring? My finger is evil! I had no idea. It always seemed so nice.

Stacey: Oh wow, yeah, that finger is evil. I think it might be after my spleen. Or perhaps my pancreas.

THREE:



Stacey: I think I look really, really super smart here (if a little constipated). And you look devious and a bit evil. I like the combo. There could be a world-takeover being plotted here. (Or maybe a blog post about grunt tubes. Take your pick.)

Julie: Shhhhh! You're not supposed to tell about the world-takeover plot.
You're ruining everything! Now what are we going to do with all the grunt tubes we ordered for our army of the undead?

FOUR:



Stacey: If we were in junior high school, this photo would have us RULING the school, RULING it I tell you! (And in another random aside, I think I have an unusually large head. My ex-husband said I did and that our son had inherited my enormous melon. I tried to explain I needed a large head to contain my gigantic brain...but...I mean, really, who am I kidding? I probably have water on the brain that my lousy doctors never bothered to drain off so that I could grow to be a normal-headed person.)

Julie: Do you think if we passed this around at a few junior highs one of them would let us rule it now? I've always wanted to reign over a junior high, but sadly my own JH felt I was better suited to serve as a minion.

Stacey: Me too! I wasn't even a minion, I was just the weird girl who wore lime green stretch pants. I was always forced to the end of the lunch line by a girl named...Julie. Hmm, good thing I don't hold grudges against people with the same names of girls who were jerks to me in junior high. (The other Julie turned out to be much nicer in high school.)

Julie: Incidentally, your hair looks very lovely and shampoo-ad like here, Stacey. Your giant head is hardly noticeable at all.

Stacey: Thanks!

FIVE:



Stacey: I think I look too buff in this one from all my Shredding with Jillian. Your biceps are jealous. I don't want your biceps to feel jealous, Jules. (Also, I can't really pull off pouty. With chipmunk cheeks like these, I'm better off cheesy or broody. No pouting allowed.) But I like the bad-ass thing you've got going on here. That finger means bidness, I can tell. Fear the finger!)

Julie: My finger again! Now it's a gun! Maybe I should stop typing and go put on some gloves. This is starting to freak me out.

My biceps are jealous, it's true. I'm a weakling. I can't even open my own jars.

SIX:



Stacey: You're totally planning to murder me in this shot...and I know it...and I kind of like the idea for some reason. What a frackin' sicko I am!

Julie: If only we had the infamous wicker chair! Then we would totally rule a junior high! (Do they still use the wicker chair, I wonder?) And I am totally planning your murder, btw.

SEVEN:



Stacey: You're moving in for the kill...and I'm still smiling like I'm going to enjoy having my neck snapped at any second...

Julie: Stacey! How could you say such a thing? This is our engagement picture for the newspaper . . . which is exactly why I'm going to kill you because I just found out the "fancy" ring you bought me is really a cubic zirconia from the Everything's $1! store.

Stacey: Hey, baby, you knew I was a struggling writer when we started this whole crazy thing we call luurrve. (And I was just trying to help cure your addiction to "fancy". Why not develop a love for "sparkle" instead? Sparkle can be pretty, but cheaper than fancy.)

EIGHT:



Stacey: Oh WAIT!! Huzzah! Turned the tables on you, bi-atch! See what I can do with those Shredded biceps now!!! (Just kidding, you're totally not a bi-atch...usually ;)). And I would never twist off your head, though I totally could if I wanted to because I am so buff.

Julie: Sniff, sniff. I'd like to believe that you would never twist off my head, but I just can't trust you anymore, not after the cubic zirconia. How could you?

Stacey: I explained that. Just think sparkle thoughts and it will all be okay.

NINE:



Stacey: You've got the cute smile, but I'm still evil. Why can't I stop being evil? Why? I look like a possessed leprechaun.

Julie: I may be smiling cutely, but really I'm pooping on your deck . . .

Stacey: Ahh...I wondered where that big pile of steaming feces came from. I was blaming the giant squirrel.

TEN:



Stacey: Finally. A nice normal picture. A little elbow-y, but it will do.

Julie: Huh. You're right. Except for the elbows, we almost look normal.

ELEVEN:



Stacey: Or maybe we should use this one...:) Nothing like a little girl talk on a teeter totter, while wearing your best knee-high boots with three-inch heels.

Julie: What are you talking about? I've had those boots since 3rd grade. What else are girls supposed to wear on the teeter totter? And now I suppose you're going to try and tell me red stilletos aren't appropriate for the swings.

Stacey: Lol.

Okay people, what say you? Everyone who chimes in with their vote in the comments will be entered to win a ZIT prize pack including all kinds of general fabulous-ness as well as an Advanced Reader copy of Stacey Jay's January release "Undead Much?" All entries must be received by Christmas Eve Day. Winner announced on Christmas Day. (Or soon thereafter...whenever Stacey gets around to it ;)).

Go, vote, wiiiinnnnnn!!!

Julie and Stacey

7 comments:

  1. I happen to like 1, 4, and 10. But my pick would have to go to 4.

    P.S. Love the comments! HILARIOUS! lol

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  2. Love the picture commentary- made me laugh out loud many times.

    My favorites are 3, 4, 7, and 10.

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  3. I'm torn between #4 (says "look how fun we are!") and #10 (says "we are serious women, don't take it personally if we splash you with our Awesome") Also I'm SO stealing "possessed leprechaun" and using it in my everyday language.

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  4. 4 is my favourite. P.S. Stacey has fabulous hair, and should NOT cut it ;-)

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  5. I like 4 the most. It's really pretty and Stacey's hair is so nice!

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  6. Hey all! Bookie Monster is our winner. Will get your info next week when I have Internet access at the new house! Happy holidays all Stacey

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  7. Internet access! I can has it!!! Going to try to contact Bookie Monster. If I can't get in touch, Monster, feel free to email me at stacey.jay.ya at gmail dot com to claim your prize.

    And thanks to all of you who complimented my hair! I really appreciate it. I did cut three inches off of it the other day, however. I just couldn't deal with the sextuplet split ends.

    Happy new year!

    Stacey Jay

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